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Gakked from [livejournal.com profile] sunshine_queen

Pick your 12 characters before answering the questions!

1) Angua von Uberwald
2) Sandman!Death
3) Nymphadora Tonks
4) Sam Spade
5) Mawata Awayuki
6) Irina Derevko
7) Arvin Sloane
8) Kei
9) Martin Fitzgerald
10) Harry Potter
11) Luke Skywalker
12) Discworld!Death

1. Who would make a better college professor, 6 (Irina) or 11 (Luke)? What subjects would they teach?

Well, Irina was a college professor for years and years and no one knew the difference, so I'd say she's pretty good at it. Luke does run his own academy, but his students turn evil, die, or get possessed all the time. So Irina wins that one. Sorry, Luke.

2. Do you think 4 (Sam) is hot? How hot?

Not really at all! She's scary and sometimes insane and her face is too pale. :P

3. 12 (Discworld!Death) sends 8 (Kei) on a mission. What is it, and does it succeed?

Hm. It would probably succeed, since Kei is a perfectionist and single-minded like that. But what could Death want from Kei? Maybe Kei has to return dead Knights to their baby selves. He'd love that.

4. What is or would be 9's (Martin's) favorite book?

Hm. How to Make Friends and Influence People? Because he kind of needs it. :P

5. Would it make more sense for 2 (Sandman!Death) to swear fealty to 6 (Irina), or the other way around?

I'd say the other way around. I can't really see Death swearing fealty to a, like, regular person, and Irina does tend to kill a lot of people.

6. For some reason, 5 (Mawata) is looking for a roommate. Should she share a studio apartment with 9 (Martin) or with 10 (Harry)?

OH NO NOT EITHER OF THEM. The last thing Mawata needs is to shack up with another emo kid.

7. 7 (Sloane), 2 (Sandman!Death) and 12 (Discworld!Death) have dinner together. Where do they go, and what do they discuss?

Hm, they'd definitely go somewhere fancy. Sloane isn't really a 'burgers and Pepsi' kind of guy. He would also have a lot to say to both Deaths, considering that he's already lost his wife and his baby to them. He'd also find some devious way to threaten them in order to keep Nadia alive until they can cure her.

8. 3 (Tonks) challenges 10 (Harry) to a duel. What happens?

Harry gets flattened and transfigured into something embarrassing.

9. If 1 (Angua) stole 8's (Kei's) most precious possession, how would he get it back?

Well, as it is tea, he could just make some more.

10. Suggest a title for a story in which 7 (Sloane) and 12 (Discworld!Death) both attain what they most desire.

Hm. "Death to Life"? Sloane, of course, would have to choose between Rambaldi's prophecy and Nadia's life. I don't know what Death wants ... a vacation? He's a pretty happy dude. He'd probably be all happy just to help Sloane out.

11. What kind of plot device would you use if you wanted 4 (Sam) and 1 (Angua) to work together?

A cross-dimensional Law Enforcement Exchange Program.

12. If 7 (Sloane) visited you for the weekend, how would you get along?

He's probably poison my water or something. So not so great.

13. If you could command 3 (Tonks) to perform any one task or service for you, what would it be?

Clean my house with magic.

14. Does anyone on your friends list write or draw 11 (Luke)?

I don't know. Cat writes Luke, I think. And maybe he cameos in some of the pilot fic. I think Puggy wrote Luke one time.

15. If 2 (Sandman!Death) had to choose sides between 4 (Sam) and 5 (Mawata), which would it be?

She'd bip them both and tell them to sort it out before she got annoyed.

16. What might 10 (Harry) shout while charging into battle?

Something in the CAPSLOCK OF RAGE! Like, DIE, VOLDEMORT! or something.

17. If you chose a song to represent 8 (Kei), which song would you choose?

Looking Through You definitely does it best. No other song is weird enough to represent Kei.

18. 1 (Angua), 6 (Irina) and 12 (Discworld!Death) are having dim sum at a Chinese restaurant. There is only one scallion pancake left, and they all reach for it at the same time. Who gets to eat it?

Irina. The other two are polite enough to let her have it.

19. What might be a good pick-up line for 2 (Sandman!Death) to use on 10 (Harry)?

I ... I can't even picture it. She'd probably throw bread at him right away, because he's so angsty. And then maybe if she was really interested, she could sing "That's Death."

20. What would 5 (Mawata) most likely be arrested for?

Stalking. Definitely.

21. What is 6's (Irina) secret?

Heh, which one? She only has, like, four million. She is secretly the mother of everyone on the show. She only hopes Syd will never find out.

22. If 11 (Luke) and 9 (Martin) were racing to a destination, who would get there first?

Luke. Martin just stopped using his cane. Besides, Luke is a Jedi Master. Martin's just a vaguely losery FBI agent.

23. 3 (Tonks) and 7 (Sloane) tell conflicting versions of events. Which is more reliable?

Tonks. Since she's not a crazy terrorist pretending to work for the CIA or anything.

24. "1 (Angua) and 9 (Martin) reluctantly team up to save the world from the threat posed by 4's (Sam's) sinister secret organization. 11 (Luke) volunteers to help them, but it is later discovered that 11 (Luke) is actually a spy for 4 (Sam). Meanwhile, 4 (Sam) has kidnapped 12 (Discworld!Death) in an attempt to force their surrender. Following the wise advice of 5 (Mawata), they seek out 3 (Tonks), who gives them what they need to complete their quest." What title would you give this fic? Name three people on your friends list who might read it. Name one person who should write it.

Okay. So can we just discuss this for a second? Sam Spade suddenly decides to take over the world, because Jack won't date her even though he's divorced now, and Martin decides to lead the vanguard to stop her, because he knew he couldn't trust those issues of hers. Martin knows he needs someone to help, because things he does always fails. So he ... goes picks a vegetarian werewolf cop from another dimension to lead with him. He also recruits a Jedi Master, who you think would have principles, but is really working for Sam. He couldn't resist her T-shirts of desire, I guess. Mara is going to kill both of them. Also, to upset everyone, Sam kidnaps Death, which would actually prompt Angua to work with Martin more, since the Death being missing thing would be messing up her world like whoa. Mawata, who manages to stop angsting long enough to fight on the side of good, suggests the cheeriest person she can imagine, Tonks. After getting together with Remus, Tonks regains her normal demeanor and kills Sam with her Death Ray of Happiness.

I would title it ... "The Most Insane Badfic Of All Time". Yubs would read it, and Hannah probably would, and Sunny, since she reads fic I write for fandoms she doesn't know all the time. Yubs is the only one who can write it, since she's the only one who knows all the characters involved.

25. If you had to walk home through a bad neighbourhood late at night, would you feel safer in the company of 7 (Sloane) or 8 (Kei)?

Wow, what a choice THIS is. I'd say Kei, because he wouldn't kill me. He'd just be annoyed that I couldn't go by myself.

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